


For I Have Sinned

by Sasswolf_Hale



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Blood, Demon possession, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-18
Updated: 2015-01-09
Packaged: 2018-02-09 10:06:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1978776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sasswolf_Hale/pseuds/Sasswolf_Hale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He knew it wasn't Lydia who twirled the knife, no matter what it looked like. It was the real monster inside. "Lydia, stop."<br/>	"Oh," Lydia's voice was darkened, her eyes going black as she mocked a cooing noise at him. "Is the puppy going to cry?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The End

It wasn't supposed to have come to this. But at the same time, it didn't matter. He had fought and struggled for months to win, and even as an alpha, he didn't have the power to save her. Struggling for breath as he used one hand to pull himself back as he fought to keep from crying. He knew it wasn't Lydia who twirled the knife, no matter what it looked like. It was the real monster inside. "Lydia, stop."

"Oh," Lydia's voice was darkened, her eyes going black as she mocked a cooing noise at him. "Is the puppy going to cry?" 

Peter looked up, face bloodied and angry at the thing playing itself off as the banshee. "Lydia, listen to me. You can fight it. I promise you. You have to trust me, Lydia." He pleaded. He was weak, and even fighting, he knew his body was starting to feel the effects of the wolfsbane the monster inside her had coated the blade in. "Just trust me, please. We can beat this."

The body moved, but Peter knew the difference between the monster controlling it and Lydia. So he wasn't surprised in the least when those eyes went black again and the demon grabbed his hair, yanking back. A low hiss did escape him as he felt the demon pull hard at his hair, crimson seeping into his eyes as he glared up at the intruder. "Lydia, you know what to do. It will work, trust me." His voice was soft, entering a realm he knew only the banshee trapped in her own mind could readily hear. He watched as the demon's hold on him faltered, and eyes returned to their natural green as Lydia stood up again. Her hands shook, likely from fighting the demon, as she looked down and nodded. Giving a soft smile and a nod in return, Peter barely managed to cover his ears before the banshee's scream ripped through the warehouse.


	2. Beginning

Sure it was weird, in a way. Lydia had known that the day she realized how she felt. But it didn't bother her in the least. After all, she wasn't oblivious to the world around her. Her best friend may have died, and she may have minutely shut herself off from the world - from the breakup between Malia and Stiles [which she was not surprised to hear about as she had known it wouldn't last, but she wanted Stiles to be happy] to the funeral, to the way that everyone had someone to lean on but her. Scott had Kira and teaching Liam to control his powers, Stiles had been going to see Derek [and let's be honest, if Liam could tell Stiles and Derek were secretly a thing, did Stiles think he could hide it from Scott and Lydia?], and Lydia had no one. So when she'd been going for a walk in the woods and run across Peter, she wasn't sure if she was grateful or scared. But Peter had helped her, granted he'd asked for things in return, but he had. He technically, whether Lydia wanted to admit it or not, had helped her understand she could be who she really was without worrying about the others around her. So while at first, they would meet in the woods and just walk, talking about things, Lydia found herself feeling a little more comfort around the former alpha than she knew she could. Eventually it wasn't just Lydia venting and talking about what she had lost; she began to learn about Peter, which was a feat she didn't know she was capable of doing in the least. It was a nice change for her to begin to see past the monster she had once thought he was.

Before she was aware of it, she knew his favorite color, every name of the eight Hales killed in the fire as well as ages, what they looked like and how they were related to Peter. She discovered things she hadn't even conceived of being true. Like the fact that Peter had been contacted by big colleges for his basketball skills, but he had turned them down to take care of his family. That he was the one of the family that taught the betas control when his sister couldn't. She found an entire new world below the surface of the man she had once feared. As she learned, a part of her was stunned. Did Derek know all these things about his uncle? Was he even aware that Peter could name every character in television series such as Dark Angel and Buffy? Each day, as Peter opened up a little more, Lydia learned something new and eventually, the banshee would go home and start making a list of the things she had found out over the afternoon spent with the wolf. The little purple book had several pages the first time she wrote in it. By now, she would remember each things she was told in simpler ways so she could write it down. A few of the items on the list included that Peter had warned Talia for months before the fire that Kate was trouble, that Peter had a stunning collection of vinyl records [which at one point she would want to listen to with him]. It also had things like Peter's shirt size, which jacket was the most worn because it was his favorite, the meal he cooked best [even though he just chose Italian in general]. Lydia's list had grown to roughly twenty pages when she asked if they could meet at his apartment. 

"Why do you want to change where we meet?" Peter asked in return, watching her with curious eyes. 

"Don't get me wrong, Peter. The woods are nice. Kind of fitting for you. But winter's coming, and I may be a fashionista, but I do not have heels capable of dealing with nighttime walks in winter." Lydia had retorted, crossing her arms as she walked. "Unless you just don't want me around."

"I never said that," Peter said, head turning and tilting at the same time as he looked at her. "Are you sure you'll be okay coming alone?" 

Lydia understood why he said it. They may be talking, but Peter was still expecting her - like everyone who thought they knew him - to hate or be scared of him. So as she stopped and looked at him seriously, her voice was even and accurate when she spoke. "I am sure. I know more about you than any of the others. Sometimes I wonder if I know more about you than your nephew ever did." she explained. "I'm not scared of you, Peter. Not anymore. I know you now."

There was a moment where Peter's face shifted form the confident smartass he showed everyone to the vulnerable, lonely man Lydia had seen as they'd been talking over the year. His eyes, for the briefest moment, had that glow of sapphire around the dark pupil, and he nodded at last. "Sure. We can head over now. It's not far."

As much as she wanted to deny it, she smiled and looked down, feeling like a schoolgirl [ironic considering she was a schoolgirl, but she didn't feel like it with her genius]. "I'd like that." she replied. "Do you have a car?"

Peter shrugged. "I walk here."

Lydia's laugh is soft, a sound that lately only Peter has heard, whether he knows it or not. "So not far by werewolf walking standards or car driving?"

Peter's lips quirk in that amused little smirk as he shakes his head a tad. "Both, I suppose. Would you like me to drive there?" he asked, tilting his head. 

Lydia's not sure if she wanted to kiss him or slap him. But she answered with a yes all the same. And with that, the banshee and the wolf started back towards her car so they could go to the apartment where Peter lived. The drive isn't loud, but it's not quiet. They talk about a few things, starting when Peter turned towards downtown by Video 2*C instead of heading for the city. She makes a comment about how she wasn't expecting him to live in the city limits. When Peter replied about needing the familiarity, the conversation takes a turn to things that have comforted them. Like Lydia's giant stack of fashion magazines and science books. She's surprised when she finds another piece to Peter's puzzle in the fact that he doesn't drink. Not because he knows he can't get drunk, but because it reminds him too much of people he's lost. Lydia finds herself wondering if one of those people he's inferring is among the wolves and humans killed when Kate set the fire. Pulling into a large complex just a few minutes from the preserve where they started their meetings, Peter parks in a front place and moves to get out. Lydia goes to open the door and is startled when Peter's already there, opening it for her. "Thank you," she said, smiling. Jackson had never done anything like that. Aiden never would have because it would have damaged his playboy image. 

"You have to be polite to the ladies, after all." Peter said. There was a sadness in the tone that Lydia is sure most of them would never hear. She knows what he means; he's trying to make up for biting her. 

Getting out, she laid a hand on his, stopping him briefly. "Don't regret that." she said, hoping she understood what it was she was saying. "You helped me, whether you were sane or not doesn't matter, Peter."

"It does to me." the wolf said before gently urging his hand from under hers and stepping back. "Come on, it's top floor." He's headed towards the door before Lydia can stop him. 

The words are so human to her that Lydia feels like she wants to cry, because she can tell how much his time as alpha has hurt him. How much he's trying and being shut down makes her angry as much as it hurts her because she was once one of the others; keeping him at fifty times arms length for fear he would hurt them all over again. And then it hit her why he'd been so distant with everyone, watching and helping only when they needed it but never offering. They had allowed Allison so much sympathy for her getting lost in insanity and trying to kill Derek's pack, and yet Peter, who had lost so much more than Allison ever had, they shunned. Lydia felt a pang of guilt that had her steps hurrying so she could be close to the older man. "So you live on the top floor? Seems nice." she said, trying to turn the conversation to more happy topics. 

Peter shrugged as he walked, looking at her as he moved. "Not as loud because no one's above me to stomp on the ceiling." he agreed. "Makes it hard to hear the front door buzzing when teenagers lose their keys and can't get in, too." He leads her into the elevator, hitting the button and leaning against the side wall. 

Lydia smiled lightly. "Do you sleep a lot, then?" she asked. 

Peter's laugh is soft, but he shakes his head. "No, despite people always saying I act like a cat. I only sleep about ten hours a night." he offered as reply. Lydia's opening her mouth to ask another question when the elevator stops and the doors open. Peter motioned for her to go ahead of him, and as she stepped out, he followed suit, letting his hand brush hers enough to get her attention so she knows which way to go. Lydia won't deny the slight disappointment she feels when he doesn't take her hand, but she isn't sure he would accept if she said how she felt. It was a kind of frustration that the banshee wasn't used to. She mentally shook it off to follow the wolf, pausing as he unlocks the door and opens it. 

"Ladies first," he says, stepping aside for her. 

Lydia smiles and walks in, amazed at how spacious the apartment is. Her green eyes took in details slowly, watching around her. She wanders in, unaware of the man entering and closing the door, taking his jacket off and hanging it on the coat rack. "It's beautiful."

"Most of it is replacements. A lot of my things were destroyed in the fire." Peter answered, setting his keys on the island/bar that divides the living and dining rooms from the kitchen. He opens a cabinet to pull down glasses, and Lydia just watches him for a minute, wondering what she could do. She's never been shy per se, but their situation is precarious. Walking over as Peter poured each of them a glass of water, she moved to stand closer to him than she had before. 

"Peter, you do know that I trust you, right?" she asked first, tilting her head. 

"Yes," Peter answered, trying not to add the 'and I don't know why' of his brain to the word. 

"So you know I know you won't hurt me." Lydia added, nodding a little as Peter turned around to look at her curiously. 

"Lydia, what are trying to say?" he asked, his head cocking slightly to the side. 

Lydia found that once he figured it out, it's hard to say the words. SO instead, she leans in, stepping closer and pressing her lips to his. For a moment, she thought he was just going to stand there. And then strong arms are around her waist as he pulled her closer, more firmly against him. A slight smile escapes her as he returns the kiss, her hands moving along his arms until one wrapped around the back of his neck and the other moved to tangle in his hair. It's at that moment where Peter's arms moved, one hand taking each of hers as he pulled them away from him. 

"You should go home before this goes any further." the voice escaping him is quiet, almost hard for even Lydia to hear. 

Once she realized what he said, she frowns a little. "Peter-"

"Lydia, you should go." 

"I don't want to. I want to be here with you."

"And you'll end up hurt." Peter's eyes are so full of hurt that while Lydia knows why he's telling her to go, she wants to resolve to stay. 

"I won't end up hurt, Peter. I can handle it." she promised. 

Peter's smile is soft, a tinge of hope that seems to be dying as he reached up to run his fingers through strawberry tresses. "Just...think about it. It's not that I don't want this. I want you to know for sure. If this is really what you want, then I'll say yes. I can't lose anyone else because of-" He cut himself off, sighing heavily. "Lydia, please. Just think before you decide you want this. Us." His voice almost cracked and Lydia reached up to lay a hand on his cheek. 

"Peter, I've been thinking about it for weeks." Lydia replied. "I want to go slow." She gave him a smile and moved to wrap her arms at his neck. "Just trust me, okay?" She watched him for a long minute. When it felt like he would still deny her, he moved and held her close. 

"You can't stay the night, Lydia." he said, resting his forehead on hers. 

"I know," Lydia replied, chuckling. "Right now, that's fine with me."

**Author's Note:**

> Just a prologue, guys. This story is a kind of wrap. The first and last chapters are "present" and all the others in between are the events that lead to it. I hope you guys like it as I go along, this plot has been itching to be posted for days. :)


End file.
